One of the cartoons I watched as a kid was from the 1930s, called Popeye: The Sailor Man. Popeye was a unique character as he was this skinny, one-eyed (no, he was not a cyclops, just drawn with a perpetual wink), pipe-smoking grumpy guy with a jutting chin and freakishly big forearms who received “Super Strength” every time he ate spinach. Popeye had a best friend named J. Wellington Wimpy. He was always mooching money from Popeye to buy a hamburger and promised to pay him back “Next Tuesday.” Popeye was also in love with a very anorexic and very annoying sounding woman who had no tits and no ass named Olive Oyl (she must have had other “redeeming features and talents” that can’t be mentioned at this time). He would occasionally get ridiculed and/or his ass kicked by his “Arch Nemesis” Bluto (sometimes called Brutus), as he was always trying to steal Olive away for her other “redeeming features and talents.” That is until Popeye ate his spinach, and then the ass-kicking was returned in kind. Popeye walked into or sailed off into the sunset with Olive Oyl in tow to take advantage of her “redeeming features and talents.”

So, why am I telling you all of this crap?

Because Popeye had a saying that he would tell anyone when he was being ridiculed or made fun of because of either his looks, being uneducated, lack of manners, his speech impediment, or whatever: “I yam what I yam, and that’s all what I yam.” But I like the shorter version: “I Yam What I Yam.”

Or, to put it in today’s vernacular, “I am what I am.”

However, to the screwed-up ones on this planet, “I am what I am” means “I am what I pretend to be.”

There is a difference between Popeye saying, “I Yam what I Yam,” and the delusional of today’s society stating I am what I am pretending to be. Popeye knew he was funny-looking, not the most educated, spoke strangely, and was what most people would call not “The Norm” of Society.

He was Popeye, The Sailor Man. A funny-looking guy who was a professional sailor. Nothing unusual about that. But some say, “But wasn’t it pretending he got super strength when he ate his spinach?” No, not really. Spinach can make you stronger, but not primarily due to its iron content. Researchers have found that the inorganic nitrate in spinach is the secret to its strength-giving property. Eating spinach can increase skeletal muscle fitness.

Truth, scientific facts, and reasoning can prove everything about Popeye. Well, maybe, except for the part about his fetish for anorexic, annoying-sounding women. But everything else about Popeye was factual, truthful, and makes perfect sense.

Fast forward almost a hundred years to today.

People say, “I am what I am,” but are not.

Take Drag Queens and Trans Freaks, for one (or two).

Two groups claim what they are, but they are most definitely not. All these people are just changing the outside of who they are. However, their chemical and physical makeup are still the same.

Let me give you a perfect example: Bruce Jenner.

Bruce Jenner changes his name to Kaitlyn Jenner. But guess what? He’s still a guy. Bruce got a Tracheal shave (surgery to remove your Adam’s Apple to give a more “Feminine Look” to your neck), but he’s still a guy. He added tits, got his butt worked on, took estrogen shots, and eventually had his dick cut off. But guess what? He’s still a guy! In his will, Bruce said he wanted to be “buried dressed as that is how he always thought about himself, and that’s how he will be going to heaven.”

(Please feel free to roll your eyeballs here).

Well, let us say Bruce died today (I hope he doesn’t, as I don’t wish death on anybody….well, most people, that is), but let us say Bruce Jenner did die today. In a thousand years, an archeologist comes around and digs up Bruce’s own personal grave. Do you know what they will say in a thousand years? “Hey Bobby, check this out! A male skeleton wearing a Vera Wang wedding dress! Just how screwed up was this guy anyway?”

See Bruce, can change his name. He can change how he looks on the outside. Still, Bruce’s chemical, DNA, chromosomes, skeletal, and physical characteristics remain the same. So, no matter how he adds to, snips off, covers up with makeup, or pretends to be, his chemical, chromosomal, and biological evidence all point to one thing: Bruce Jenner is still a man.

It would be no different than taking the cover off a Bible and putting over the book Karma Sutra and calling it Holy Scripture. It just doesn’t work that way.

Another group of people who say “I am what I am” but are really not are Politicians.

Politicians have this unique trick to get the masses to believe everything they say. It’s actually based on the principle of the contents of Rat Poison. If you read the box of the ingredients, you will see that most of the contents are actually good food. But the manufacturers mix in just a little bit of the poison. Just enough where if the rats eat the excellent food, they also eat the poison, and Poof! Dead Rat.

So when a politician tells us, “It’s good for the poor and middle class while we tax the rich,” semi-truth, just realize your life has just become more fucked up than it was before.

Wouldn’t it be cool if every time a politician told a lie (other than the sporadic cases of National Security and Military Actions against forces against the United States), their noses would grow just like Pinocchio?

Imagine watching a televised debate on the House of Representatives or The Senate floor. Those bastards would lie so often, and their noses would be so long that they couldn’t leave their respective chambers.

Since we are coming to the presidential elections, can you imagine watching a political ad slamming Donald Trump? You hear, “I’m Kamala Harris, and I approve this message.” Then the camera cuts away at her, and you see her nose grow to about 3 feet long.

I firmly believe politics was initially meant to be an advocation, not a vocation. Politicians used to be people of honor, trust, and dignity.

Not anymore!

As of September 2024, the approval rating of the United States Congress is around 20%.

Ever stop to think about that? Only 2 out of 10 people believe the members of Congress are doing a good job. Why? We can’t trust them because of all the lies they have told us. I’m betting if you excluded Congressional family members from that poll, the approval rate would drop from 20% to about 4%, leaving only the dead and illegal aliens voting in the affirmative.

Politicians not only lie like Pinocchio, but they also tell us stories to cover up their lies.

When was the last time you really believed what a politician said? They put up this front of a fine, upstanding, moral human being just to get elected. Then once all the votes (legitimate and otherwise) are county, it is like they pull their rubber mask off like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible, and the real evil, foul-smelling, lying, two-faced son of a bitch comes out.

An old saying goes like this: “You can’t judge a book by its cover.”

More actual words were never spoken.

Because when it comes to buying a drink for what you think is a cute girl in a dimly lit bar only to discover later on that “she” has a dick bigger than yours or a person standing on a stage in a $500.00 suit and udders the following words “I’m from the government, and I’m here to help” the answer it obvious very clear.

GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE!